I've been feeling really odd lately. Super good highs, but really down lows ... and thought maybe I'd post about it and see if any of you out there have any wisdom for me?
Katia will be a year old next week, so I'm not sure if I should be feeling these things all of a sudden? I mean, my body should be going back to normal now - no? I've been working hard at getting myself healthy - and all of a sudden, in the last two days - I've hit a wall. I can't figure it out ... but out of nowhere, I want to sit on the couch, eat myself into oblivion and do nothing. When the sun was shining, it gave me a headache. And now that it's cloudy, I want to stay in my jammies.
What the heck?? I should be running 8km today ... not salivating over the possibility of eating nutella out of the jar ...
And this is so strange, because Sunday night was a high for me ... leading at the Recovery Service is just plain joy for me. And I left feeling connected, rejuvenated, filled. So - how does 48hours take that all away?
I'm just feeling ... well ... useless?? Is that it? Lonely? ... hmm. Bored? ... ugh. I don't know. Maybe it's that I miss my connections ... being away so much this summer has been a truly great thing, but I've missed out on a lot of much-loved friend time.
So ... today's plan is that I am going to create some creative-time with my boys. We are going to create Tias' "Aquarium" cake for his birthday party tomorrow ... that'll either bring tears of joy, or of frustration *grin*. I'm really looking forward to tomorrow ... the party will be a great time to see friends, and then we're off to a fund-raiser with a bunch of other great people tomorrow night ...
But for today - I might just let myself have a good cry ... for no reason at all. And maybe then I'll be able to rid this lame cloud over me.
Blah.
Have a good one ...