21 April 2009

[talk & make: A Village, Not an Army]

Ok. So first off, I need your help.

I am preparing for my New Zealand/Australia trip and am having to plan for 14 meals while I'm gone. YIKES. I thought that I would put together a binder for the home, and whoever is here at the time, so that things like "dinner" still happen *smile*.

There are the basics, for example lasagna, but I'm wondering if YOU have any "one dish" meal recipes that can be frozen? I'm hoping for some variety - but also needing to let you know that my hubby doesn't eat fish (except tuna) and doesn't enjoy curry.

Would you be able to help me out? Please send any recipes to helptawn@hotmail.com ... many, many, MANY thanks!!

* * * * * * *

On another note, I am continuing to be reminded that "fear" and "faith" do not coincide together. It seems to be a reoccurring message that is smacking me in the head ... which is a good thing. Sometimes my first reaction is to play out the scenario to it's absolute worst ... and as I said in a previous post - possibly as a defence mechanism to help prevent disappointment and such. Whatever the case, I am now actively aware of this trait and am going to start exercising the muscle of "thanks, but no thanks" when fear rears it's ugly head. A hard muscle to use, for sure, but one that needs to be strengthened. I am thankful for family and friends who gently encourage and are discerning in their timing with such reminders.

Which brings me to my final thought - how we surround ourselves. Our village. The people we allow to speak into our lives. Recently, I purchased a book called "Battlefield of the Mind" by Joyce Meyers. A friend has suggested it, after I found myself confused with contrary advice and comments from different people in my life.

Here's the thing. I believe strongly in being surrounded by like-minded people. People who can hold you accountable and have your best interest at heart. People who know what your ultimate goals are and keep you on the path to getting there. But I'm learning that maybe this should be a small, intimate group - rather than an army of voices. Not because there are only a few with noble character and such, but because it is impossible to be intimate and vulnerable with so many. And sometimes, advice and thoughts are given out without them knowing the entire situation. This is not their fault - but rather it is simply the result of the lack of knowledge of the circumstance and so on.

In my own life, I have mentors, friends - I have family, leadership in our church ... and all of these are good things. In fact, I have different people that I call on for different things in my life. I have life-long family and friends that I know I can be horribly vulnerable with, and they will validate and steer me in the right direction. I also have people who I call on who have wisdom in specific areas of life ... they are truly a gift as well.

But as I am walking out of a difficult circumstance with my hubby's injury and such, I realize that I simply cannot allow everyone's opinion into my heart. Again, not due to their poor character, but due to my own need to keep some things private and not giving them enough information to form a fair opinion.

On an absolute FINAL note *smile*, I would like to thank each and every one of you who commented on my post "Doom of the Change Room". I got some HILARIOUS reactions in my personal email, with women making light of their own situation. Some left comments who felt validated and were relieved that they weren't alone. And I received some responses who's ache I felt, as the walked their own journey of desiring a child. So many voices, so many different circumstances. Each one valid and beautiful in their own way.

Just as each one of us are.


Anonymous said...

what about gourmet takeaway?

Lori F.

Crystal said...

A really good book that my SIL recommended to me and some of us have been reading is called "grown up girlfriends", by Garry smalley's wife and her SIL. Anyways, it was a really great read and talks about this very subject. How we can't pour out our hearts to everyone and that there are different "levels" of friendships, and knowing who to trust your feelings with what, and at what level. anyways, maybe a read for your upcoming plane ride...but I highly recommend it for any gal:)

Tawn said...

Lori - a GREAT idea!! (why didn't I think of that???).

And Crystal ... I'm going to look into this book ... thanks for the tip!

Nadine said...

Hi Tania,

I'm Crystal's SIL, I would highly recommend the book that Crystal mentioned. I have blogged about it quite a bit because it's totally spoke to me. I have always struggled with girlfriends and friends in general. I don't seem to have a good idea of how a friendship is supposed to work and on what level I should hold each person. This book revealed to me that so many things that I can't even begin to narrow them down.

I totally encourage you to pick up this book. Grown-Up Girlfriends by Erin Smalley and Carrie Oliver. (it's produced by Focus on the Family, so check out their bookstore in Langley first because they had great prices on them recently) I pray that it would bless you the way it has me.