[shalom: A Big Dream]

:: ... along the same lines as my last post - I found this.  I wrote this many months ago, and put it in my "drafts" box and was reminded of it today.  I'm feeling a bit of stirring ... ::

A long time ago, I had a dream.  it was a dream about putting together something tangible that would comfort and bless women and families in their journey of loss.

When we walked through our journey with Shalom, it became quite obvious that there wasn't a Hallmark card for the occasion.  I'm sure people felt awkward around us, not sure what to say - and there really wasn't anything out there that could comfort us in our unique situation.  I felt like nobody could relate - no one really knew.

 Then, I received a book from my cousin in New Zealand.  It was called "Jesse: Found In Heaven".  It's the written experience of a pastor's wife, and her journey with her miscarriage.  After I read it, I bought ten copies, and whenever I would hear of someone losing a child through a miscarriage, I would give them this book ... (hmmm ... I really need to get some more of these as I'm all out now ...).

But after I read the book, I thought "Yeah, that's great and all - but it's not my story."  And that's when an idea came to me.

Three years ago I sent out an email to many, many women asking them if they would be interested in being apart of a project that I believed was God-breathed.  And out of over 30 women, only two responded.  Not the best results for moving forward, so I put the whole thing on hold.  But as a many different events have transpired as of late, I think it's time to try again.

Here's my vision:  to have a collection of true-life experiences written by women who have lost a child.  Whether it was through a miscarriage, stillborn, abortion, car accident, cancer - or perhaps the loss of not being able to bear a biological child, or the taking-away of a foster child ... it doesn't matter.  And each story would be individual - but have a positive message in the end of how God has restored, healed or carried them through their trial and is continuing to do so.

My heart is to have this collection, along with black and white photos of each woman (that I could possibly take?) with their story, placed  in Christian bookstores.  To have them in a place where people could find this unique book and say, "Hey - I know someone who needs to read this."

My hope is that all proceeds could go to the BC Children's Hospital, and have all women agree to this upon being apart of this project.

I'm really nervous to put this out there - but I wonder, if you, or someone you know, may wish to be apart of such a project.  I'm scared that no one will respond *blush* ... but I feel that I need to be brave and just do it.

I have only my story - and probably not many in this world could relate to my own loss. And maybe you feel the same. But, I think that if we do this collectively, it could be powerful.

If you're interested, please contact me at:  tawnsblog@hotmail.com .

Thanks.