[digiscrap: More.]

I feel blah .., lazy, on edge - not myself.  The quick weather change always seems to suffocate me for some reason ... someone once said it was the change in air pressure.   Maybe it's being stuck indoors.  Maybe it's the decline in photoshoots these next two weeks; maybe it's just not taking care of myself this week ... Whatever it is - it needs to change.

I'm going to do my Jillian workout now - as I've only run once this week and I have a 5km race tomorrow.  Ugh.  Totally not motivated ... wish I could be alone on the couch watching chick-flicks and eating ice-cream out of the box (good thing I don't have any ... ).

Whatever.  Disappointed in myself this week ... not a lot to show for it.  Numbers on the scale haven't gone up ... or down.

Ok.  

Hi Jillian.

... and here are some more digipages ... click images to enlarge.

Have a good one *sigh* ... *wink*.

[digiscrap: More Pages.]

Well - life is actually getting calmer around here.  Rain means that I don't have as many shoots and that means more time in the evenings to do what I also really love to do ... digiscrap.

Here are some pages that I've just done - and I actually have 3 blogposts filed away that are full of pages to show you too - lots to show ... and I'm ALMOST caught up.  But - there are a few pics from last year that I still have to do too ... tonight.  I'm excited.  Thursday night is digiscrap-night.

Have a great one!!

click images to enlarge ...

[be challenged: I Am Second]

Have you seen this?

I Am Second.

So beautiful, so full of truth.

Sit down for a moment ... it's worth it.

www.iamsecond.com ... is the site.

Here's an example of many, many actors, athletes, musicians and people just like you and me ...  Meet the lead singer of Korn - a band that I never listened to.  They scared me to death.  But now ...?  

Wow.  That's some good stuff ...

Have a good one.

[redhanded photography: Rourke Family]

... I feel - icky.

I woke up this morning with an ache in my arm and hand like none other.  It hurt from the bone - and I soon realized:  it was raining.  

I have a lump in my hand that I had removed about 5 years ago ... and the one lump was actually about 20 small ones.  Apparently, the joint in my hand leaks and I was told that the lump(s) would just grow back.  And they did.  

I can see it even as I sit here ... it causes me grief as I type and edit pics, and last night I played keys at the Recovery Service ... and now the rain.  So - before breakfast, I downed a couple of advil and am hoping to have a warm shower to ease the dull throbbing of it all.

Ah well.  It's November ... happens every year.

So instead of a post here (although, that kinda was one, I guess ... ), come visit my RedHanded Photography blog to see the Rourke Family session.  They are such a wonderful couple - if you know them, you know what I mean ... and if you wish, leave a comment - clients love to read lovely words about their photos *smile*.

Have a great one!

[talk: The Chaos of Our Family Pic]

You'd think that I would have a lot of pics of my fam.  Oh - and I have a LOT of pics, but maybe only a handful with all of us together.  Specifically speaking - I'm never in them.  And you know how it is ... when kids are so young, trying to get ONE good shot is pretty much impossible.  Especially if your in control of the camera too.

SO with today being another gloriously sunny day, I decided that I needed a family pic.  Today.  

I've been editing a whackload of pics that I've taken of other families, and started pining for my own.  Why don't I use a photographer??  GOOD question.  The truth?  My hubby hates ... I mean HATES ... his pic being taken.  For him, it's a waste of time, he doesn't have the patience, and forget about anything creative ... which is funny, because he loves my digiscrapping and everything else.  With last year's "Christmas Card Photo", he said, "Baby, you have two minutes - the hockey game is on."  ... thank goodness it turned out ok.  You can see it on my side panel on the right ... the title "Fall 2009".

So today when my hubby came home from work, I quickly got the three kids ready and I set up the tripod in our back yard.  I laid out the blanket (our grass is mud this time of year),  positioned everyone,  set the timer, and ran like a crazy women before the camera clicked in the 10seconds I had.

Here's the first one ...

No good.  Let's try again.

Nope.  Again.

Oh brother.  By this time, I was SWEATING.  Running back and forth ... sheesh.  All I wanted was a family pic ... And Lu's leg - see the bandage??  He was in so much pain and was just like, "Please, let's just get this over with." ... gotta love that for a family pic.

Ok.  Let's give it another go.

Hmm.  Not bad.  But, not a "hang it up on the wall" kinda pic.  One more try.  Just to be sure.

Phewf.  So - it's far from perfect, but good ENOUGH.

So there you have it.  A photographer's quest for her own family pic.  And if only my hubby would enjoy these kinds of things - I could have a photoshoot with some of the many great photographers out there ... it would be creative, candid - we'd have individual pics of us with each child, someone else would be thinking creatively, and and and ... 

But alas - this is what will be my Christmas Card pic.

Speaking of which ... last year I had a contest, remember?  

Well, this year - there's going to be another one and the GRAND PRIZE has to do with me being behind the camera for YOUR family photo ...

For all the juicy details visit my RedHanded Photography blog HERE ... it's gonna be good!!

And hey.  Have a good one *wink*.

[biggest loser: Why, Hello Mr. Waist.]

The numbers are down slightly ... but not only that - the toning has begun.

Today's weight:  134.0lbs

Wow.  It feels like I've been battling this for forever, and I ACTUALLY see the light at the end of the tunnel.  Wow.   That is a great thing ...  Two pounds until prepreggo ... 

I started doing Jillian's "30day Shred", as a compliment to my running schedule.  Truth is, I don't always have a bunch of time to run and clean up afterwards ... so Jillian's 20min workout saves me time, and I cannot believe that I'm seeing results already.  I have entered a couple of running races ... a couple of 5km and one 10km.  So, Jillian can't be all that I do ... I do have to make the effort to run as well.

What's been so encouraging is seeing people that I haven't seen in a couple of months, and their compliments to how I'm doing.  When you feel like nothing is changing with all your hard work, it is SO encouraging to be reaffirmed that your efforts are paying off.

On another note, I went to my highschool's 25th Anniversary ... not MY highschool reunion, the SCHOOL's *grin*.  I saw so many people, teachers and alumni alike ... and a lot of families who have their kids enrolled there.  I loved that school - but we chose to not have our kids attend because of our dream to own land and live out further in the valley.  We chose a school for our kids, based on where we hope to be in the the next 5 years.  

But.  I have to say ... I was actually a little bit, "Um - why don't our kids go here??".  The sheer ability to do things based on finances is a huge perk.  The facilities of my old school are incredible, the outreach program continues to be a massive opportunity for many, and the faith based teaching ... really great.  

But I know that our kids are where they're supposed to be.  I LOVE our kid's school ... it was just a bit nostalgic for me yesterday.  And that's not why our kids should go there ... we have to think about our own family, time driving, and the ability to be involved as much as we can.

So ... for all of you who went there and were unable to attend ... you'll be pleased to know that our little school is an estate of education.  It's quite the thing to see how much it's grown and changed ... some of us were there at its most humble beginnings into the transformation to the new campus ... 

ANYway ... a bit sidetracked here ... but that's what's on my mind today.

OH!  And I put up a full post of "Jere and Shari Pue" on my RedHanded Photography blog yesterday.  If you didn't have a chance to check it out, click HERE to view.  

These are some of my most favourite images to date ... 

Ok ... must run.  Literally.

Have a great one!

[talk: A Bunch of Stuff ... ]

 So.   Tias is at school, Katia is napping and Josiah is playing ... so I have a few moments to write some thoughts down here.

Things are going well ... this week is packed, and I kinda like it that way.

As I type this, my hubby is in surgery.  He is getting the screws and plates taken out of his leg ... this has been an on-going thing since March of last year, so we are excited for this phase to be over.  My hubby was nervous this morning - more about the pain than anything else.  He's been told that he cannot do anything other than walking and sitting (no lifting, biking, jumping, running ... ) for 6 weeks until the holes in his legs are healed.  I pray that they heal quickly, not like his leg.  What was supposed to be a three month healing time, ended up being almost 16 months.  So hopefully, things will go well for him.

He's most excited about playing winter sports with our boys ... skiing, in particular.  He wasn't able to put his ski boots on last winter with the plates in, so we are believing that with them removed, he'll be able to do all that he was able to do before he broke his leg.

This was a difficult choice, to have the surgery today.  The waiting list was 12-15 months with the public health system, so we chose to use Private care.  And it is very expensive.  So expensive, that I have put my dreams of a new camera to rest ...  my hubby's leg and quality of life far surpass the expansion of my little business.

Far surpass.

On another note, my folks are coming back from their "Trip of a Lifetime" this week ... our kids are counting down the days, as I'm sure my parents are.  We've noticed a lot more emails and contact from them as of late - a sure sign that they're ready to come home and catch up with everyone back here.

With RedHanded Photography, things are BUSY.  For now.  But November/December/January are pretty open ... that's what happens when the weather turns icky.  I have a couple of weddings, and some brave couples/families are doing "city winter" shoots ... that'll be super fun.

I'm also getting a bit tired of my website and am hoping to change and update it ... sometime.  Not sure how or when.  But I'd like to ...   

I photographed an intimate wedding on Saturday night, and a bun-in-the-oven maternity shoot on Friday with Jeremy and Shari Pue.  I've done a teaser post for that one ... some of my favourite images to date.  Come stop by, would love to have you ... click HERE to view the teaser.

I have three, possibly four, shoots this week ... plus Saturday's wedding couple are moving next week to California and I am going try and get ALL of their stuff done by next Monday night, when we're meeting.  Oh, Lord.  I'm hoping that I can get that done ... 

So.  That's it.  Well.  Not really ... there's the book that I'm collaborating with 20 other women, I'm singing in our church's Christmas production - and the practices have begun, my highschool is having a reunion of sorts tomorrow night, and I'm leading worship on Sunday night at the Recovery Service ...

Hmm.

I think I need a cup of tea ... and time to cuddle Josiah before the next round of duties begin.

Have a great one!

[talk: Pumpkin Frustration.]

Long and short - yesterday was a day full of frustration.  It seemed that everything went wrong, and I spent most of the day waiting and re-planning ... some Yaahoo flipped the bird at me while I was merging into his lane ... and it's amazing.  That totally deflated me.

It started with a 55 minute wait at the Dr. office with Katia and ended with me falling apart at the end of the day.  After dinner, I was lying on my stomach on the familyroom carpet to help with some stomach pains and Josiah decided I was a trampoline and BUM DROPPED on my back.  I started sobbing - out of control sobbing, to the point that my hubby was like, "You're scaring the kids."

I couldn't stop.

Poor little guy ... he didn't mean it, and either did I.  But the water works just flowed ... it was just one of those days.  And the truth is ... it really wasn't the worst day of my life.  Not even close.  In fact, it was actually a good day - but I felt so defeated, so attacked.  Don't even know why.

Ever have a day like that??

We did make it to the pumpkin patch - oh, and that's a story all on its own.  I picked up a friend and her kids, headed to the patch - only to find it was closed.  UGH.  So, we wandered around, and found one ... only to realize that they only took cash.  Off we went to the bank ... yadayadayada ...  BUT - it was a BEAUTIFUL patch and we had it all to ourselves.  And the pumpkins were CHEAP.  17cents a pound.  Brilliant.

So, today is going to be a great day *grin*.   I feel it.  I already finished my first day of "Jillian's 30day Shred".  I can run 10km, no prob, but the 20min strength and abs almost killed me.  Which actually, was really great.  A new challenge - and running isn't toning my body the way I need it to.  Losing weight is good - if you need to (which I certainly do) - but toning is going to be the key to feeling like I've accomplished something ...

Hmmm ... I didn't weigh in this week, did I.    Today's weight:   134.2lbs  ... down a fraction from my lowest.  I'm only 2lbs from prepreggo weight ... almost 10lbs to my goal.  Working, working, working ...

Anyway, here are some pics from yesterday's trip to the pumpkin patch ... 

Have a good one ... 

[digiscrap: Fall. ]

Fall means hockey.

Hockey means my hubby is out.

My hubby being out means I have full control over the remote *grin*.

Having full control over the remote means I can digiscrap with Dateline keeping me company.

I plan on getting a whole BUNCH of digiscrapping/photo editing/finishing up RH projects this week.  I'm excited about that.  But, it being October - it just means that there are million MORE pics to take.  Thanksgiving, fieldtrips, The Pumpkin Patch, Hallowe'en ... so.  I might be able to catch up.  But then I'll be swamped yet again.

And I have a MILLION (well.  maybe nine-hundred-thousand) summer pics to digiscrap and get off of my computer ... I have high hopes for this week.  Mainly because I'm ALMOST done all my RH stuff.  Whoo hoo!!  I love my job, but I love having evenings to do my own family stuff too ...

My goal is to be totally caught up by December 1.  How great would that be, to bring in the new year being all caught up??  ( ... a large pause here as I drift into lala land, imagining having everything done and being ... wait for it ... bored.  Wow.  Not possible ... )

So ... here are a few pages.  Yeah, yeah, from SPRING -  but whatever *grin*.  

Have a great one!

click images to enlarge.

Oh this week is going to be full of such fantastic things!!!  Tell you all about it soon ...

Have a great one!!

[big dreams: Contracts.]

Thank YOU.  So many women have contacted me about this project that has been on my heart for so many years now.  It's so exciting to see it all come to life right in front of my eyes.  I'm believing for 20 women or more ... right now there are 17 women, 17 incredible women who are joining me in this and sharing their stories for the strength of others.

If you are one of those women, you should have received an email from me detailing what you may wish to include in your write up.  I am already getting stories back, and now I am scrambling to make sure everything is done correctly.  *grin*.  Typical me.

I will be putting together a contract that will be emailed to all of the women involved.  You will have to print it out, fill out any necessary information, sign it, make a copy for your own records, and mail the original to me.

The contract will state what the project is, the purpose of it, and basic legalities regarding the sharing of your stories.  Please remember that there is no money to be made from this - with any proceeds made, going to the BC Children's Hospital.  Any woman involved in this project will have full access to the accounting and will receive updates on monies earned and donated.

I am CERTAIN that there will be much more for me to learn and figure out here ... but primarily, I want everyone to know that this is NOT my book.  It's "ours".  Any time I put into this is donated ... I will NOT be taking ANY commission for ANY reason.  And this is important to have in contract form to protect both myself and all of those involved.

ANYway ... kindof a strange blogpost - but this is for those of you who are debating whether to be involved, and aren't on my email list already ... 

For everyone else ... if you believe in this project, please pray for all of us.  Your prayers are so appreciated   - as this whole thing will be in vain if it doesn't touch, strengthen and encourage other women.

Thank you so much ... 

OH!!!!  And I did weigh in this morning ... so disappointing.  135.2lbs.  Haven't lost anything in 2 weeks.  In fact, I'm up .5-ish.  Funny though ... when I was 145lb, I DREAMED of being 135.  Now that I'm 135lb, I feel like a heifer.  While the weight was coming off, I felt like my clothes fit and I felt good ... and yet now it feels like nothing fits - and that I'm at least 10lbs overweight.  How is that??

My gut ... I'm telling you - 4 pregnancies have taken it's toll.  It's just ... there.  And running isn't doing anything with my weight anymore it seems (other than clearing my head, and all the other good things it DOES do ...).  So, this morning I pulled out the dreaded "Jillian Michaels:  30 Day Shred" dvd.  I bought it in the spring - and it's still in it's wrap *grin*.

The plan ... when I don't have enough time to run (I need at least 40minutes for cool down, stretching and a 5km ...) - I'll do the shred.  I hear it's brutal.  But I think I need brutal ... Having Jillian scream at me might be just perfect.

We'll see.

Besides, I think this week will be a big week for me ... come ON 132lbs.  (why not dream big? right?).

Have a great one!

[big dreams: Step One. Or it is Two?]

It's after midnight on Thursday night, and I am out-of-control tired ... but I know I won't have time tomorrow to post and I wanted to make sure I got this out ... 

For those of you who contacted me regarding the book project I am putting together, check your email *smile*.  I have sent emails to everyone who contacted me through tawnsblog@hotmail.com .  If you spoke to me, or Facebooked me, or had someone else talk to me on your behalf - please take a moment and contact me through tawnsblog@hotmail.com .  Otherwise, I scared I won't remember!

I have 14 women, possibly 15, confirmed to be involved in this project of telling their stories of loss and of hope.  I am believing for 20 women.

Not sure what this is about?  Click "big dreams" on the side panel and scroll through the blog entries for info.  

If you are interested, let me know - and I'll send you out the informative email for you and you can join this team ... I believe it's going to be powerful!!

Ok ... MUST go to bed, that is, if I can sleep *smile* ... at least I can't ever say I'm bored *GRIN*!!

Have a good one!